Though Elliot boasts that through private practice she gets to get to know her patients, nobody seems to care. Carla is amazed at how the Janitor was able to score such an attractive girlfriend. The doctors are improving their services to g...

J.D. and Turk take a trip down memory lane to their first prank together in the midst of planning their next one. Dr. Cox has an 11-year-old patient, Josh, with leukemia. Dr. Cox has to deal with the child's parents who want to keep th...

The Janitor learns that J.D. uses nicknames for people in the hospital whose names he doesn't know, and challenges him to learn the real names of everyone in the hospital, or take over as the Janitor for a day. Also, Dr. Cox's fam...

When the Janitor watches An Inconvenient Truth, he decides to become an Environmental Officer at Sacred Heart (with peculiar motivational methods). J.D. must deal with an inconvenient truth of his own when Dan returns to town and tells him ...

J.D.'s pregnant girlfriend, Kim, goes into labor as they begin to question their strength as a couple and as potential parents. Meanwhile, the rest of Sacred Heart team also seem to be having parenting issues, with Cox wondering whethe...

After the events in the On-Call room, J.D. and Elliot continue to question their respective commitments to Kim and Keith. Carla tells Turk that due to his diabetes, he can only have one candy bar every six months. Dr Cox struggles to diagno...

Malcolm is angry because during a game of street hockey, he sprints up and down the street in shoes, only to have it start back the other way. So he decides he is ready to take skating lessons from his dad.

Reese becomes so head-over-heels for a girl on the cheerleading squad that he actually decides to join. Dewey tries to convince Lois and Hal to buy him a new toy. Francis suffers through a long lecture from Spangler.

The family gets ready to attend a relative's funeral, which affects Malcolm's plans to spend time with Julie. Upset that everyone doesn't want to go and that no one pulls their own weight around the house, Lois goes on strike...

Malcolm is upset about having to dance in front of the school with the other Krelboynes, so he decides to ditch school.

After the kids blow up the store's steam cleaner, and Dewey confesses to stealing a $150 bottle of cognac, Lois's firing prompts household economizing to an extent that causes Malcolm mortifying embarrassment at school

Disasters abound at a gifted kids' picnic, where stage acts bomb, families feud, and Malcolm's dad Hal serves meat to vegetarians. Despite Malcolm's best efforts -- feigning sickness, planning to go over the wall with Francis

Francis goes AWOL from military school and comes home to get together with his ditzy girlfriend, so they can get away forever. She turns out to be a thief who doesn't pay attention to Francis.

Malcolm sleeps over at Stevie's house and, appalled at his over-protected lifestyle, persuades him to sneak out to a late-night games arcade. Meanwhile, Francis copes with a bullying group of cadets by telling them home tales about rea...

Malcolm's cushy babysitting job provides relief from the trailer the family's using while their house is being fumigated, until Malcolm learns that the trust placed in him in his new position is strictly limited. Meanwhile, the mi...

Parallel stories pit Malcolm against Kevin, a bullying, obnoxious new kid who goads Malcolm into beating him up; and Francis vies with his intimidating military-school commandant, who's presenting sex-education lectures.